If Our Body Can Heal Itself, Why Not the Mind?
Recently, the coach of a youth hockey team shared how his team was hit by various injuries this year. He described two players who both suffered shoulder injuries. One broke his collarbone, and the other broke his clavicle and dislocated his shoulder. I asked how the...
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Competence Does Not Equal Confidence
Before almost every game in my first two years in college, I would leave the team and sneak to the bathroom to throw up. Actually, I never vomited because I had no food in my stomach; I only dry-heaved, which was even worse. Like many people, I misunderstood the...
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Simplicity-Understanding the Gift of Feeling Out of Sorts
Thank you, God. Somehow I came to believe that an off feeling (anxiety, doubt, insecurity, anger, sadness) was a problem and something to be challenged, fixed and overcome. I worked really hard seeking relief when I felt out of sorts. My striving and hard work...
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I Hate This Feeling!
I HATE FEELING LIKE THIS! If you believe that you choose how you feel about a person, event, or circumstance, consider this. Last week my son, who is a freshman starting guard for his high school basketball team, was playing in his first home game against a nationally...
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How to Win Against Injury
On a Saturday in early August, I was golfing with my brother, Scott, when he received an upsetting phone call. As we rode in the cart to the first green, I asked him about the call. He said it was Shawn, his oldest son. With tears in his eyes, he quietly told me that...
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Understanding Anxiety Associations
Sometimes we associate our anxiety with inanimate objects. Like the tee box on a golf course. That was the case with a college golfer I worked with. Her anxiety, doubt, and insecurity were off the charts—so much so that she automatically started looking for a trashcan...
read moreEnhancing Well Being
One of the first steps to reducing your dysfunction and enhancing well-being is to better understand the principle of thought. 1) All people think. Your moment-to-moment thinking creates and shapes all experiences and perceptions, all day and every day. Notice as your...
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Tournament Anxiety is All About Weathering Your Thought Storm
I worked with a young tennis player who loved to practice and work on her game but was overcome with pretournament anxiety when it came to playing singles (she felt little angst before and during her doubles matches). Her angst was so high that she thought about...
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How to Watch the News and Not Lose Your Mind
Review your Twitter feed, read an online newspaper, or turn on your TV to watch the news, and you are undoubtedly bombarded with stories describing all that is wrong with and plaguing your community and our country. There is not a shortage of issues facing us. So how...
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If Only and The Rat Race
IF ONLY... I can start of my high school team I can earn a college scholarship I can get into the college of my choice I can play professionally I can make a lot of money I can win a championship I can make dean's list I can own my own company I can have plenty of...
read moreAn Interesting Question
I was recently asked the following: “What is obvious to you but not so obvious to others?” Here is my 19-point answer: All people feel angst, insecurity, doubt, fear (although I use a different word), nervousness, anger. Feeling anxious does not mean you have a...
read more7 Strategies That Clutter Your Mind, Lower Your Mind-Set, and Narrow Your Perspective
1) Trying to control your thinking. 2) Trying to change, manipulate, or replace “bad” thoughts with “good” thoughts. 3) Consistently judging, criticizing, or labeling your thinking. 4) Seeking a clear mind and high mind-set. 5) Looking for an explanation and/or...
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FIGHTING A BATTLE YOU CANNOT WIN
A common theme I encounter with those I work with revolves around the propensity to judge the content and quality of their thinking and their subsequent feelings. I get it. I too fall into the trap of rating the quality of my thoughts based on my habitual thought...
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Goldie, Separation Anxiety and Understanding
In kindergarten and first grade, my youngest son, Cole would carry his brown little blanket (Goldie) to school. Every day Goldie was firmly in his grasp, often by his face, wiping away tears as his separation anxiety skyrocketed the closer he came to his classroom....
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OVERWHELMED
Like most Saturday's and Sunday's during this season of my life, I spent the past weekend at one of my son’s sporting events, and I had a parent approach me to share about his son’s struggle with pre-game anxiety. These conversations are quickly becoming the norm. As...
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The Anxiety Myth
"My son is really nervous before this game." As it turns out, her son played exceptionally well and was the difference in the game. It is a complete myth athletes have to feel well to play well. To consistently perform at a high level, athletes need to understand any...
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DISPELLING A MYTH
I landed in New York hours early so I could meet the head football coach and some of his players before the team’s evening practice. Our brief interactions went well, but later, alone in my hotel room preparing for the next day’s workshop, I was overcome by anxiety,...
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Working Out the Meaning of Inside-Out
I woke up last Thursday excited to start my tenth consecutive day of working out. I couldn’t wait for the boys to head to school so I could get in my morning sweat. The next day, on day 11, I woke up and the last thing I wanted to do was put on my sneakers and socks...
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